Luigi VS Tails
Luigi vs. Tails is the 32nd episode of Death Battle. It featured Luigi and Tails the Fox, sidekicks to previous Death Battle combatants, Mario and Sonic. Interlude Wiz: With the dragon slain and the princess rescued, the hero revels in gold, glory and cake. Boomstick: But they couldn't have done it without a little help. Wiz: The sidekick. The people's champion would be lost without his player 2. Wiz: Such as Luigi, Mario's younger brother... Boomstick: And Tails the Fox, Sonic's deformed flying stalker. Wiz: Now we have already proven that standard Mario and Sonic series power-ups perfectly counter each other, so, to not waste time, we're giving these second strings only what unique to them. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor and skills to find out who would win a DEATH BATTLE. Luigi Wiz: After clobbering Koopas, besting Bowser, and saving the princess, who gets all the credit? Boomstick: Mario, of course. Leaving his lanky brother with rejected sloppy seconds. Wiz: No doubt, Luigi has it rough. Despite being born as one of the seven star children destined for greatness, it's not easy being second fiddle to the most popular character in video game history. Yet he doesn't seem to mind, like a good sidekick, Luigi exists only to help Mario, never asking for his own slice of the cake. Boomstick: So he's pretty much a slave. Wiz: In a way, but this devotion makes him the perfect teammate, helping to save the Mushroom Kingdom time and time again. Boomstick: What did Mario do to him to make him so obedient? He's gotta have some serious dirt from their childhood. Wiz: Luigi may take subordination to an extreme, but he's no pushover. In fact, he's not only taller than Mario, but also faster and more athletic. He can jump over 6 feet higher, plus after studying Yoshi's superb jumping ability, Luigi developed his own variant of the dinosaur's floating technique, the Scuttle Jump. Boomstick: His abilities don't end with a mid-air hustle, Luigi has plenty of powerful attacks, each of which have pulled off perfectly, increase their damage for quick KO's. There's the spinning Luigi Cyclone, the rocketing Green Missile, and the Super Jump Punch, which can send his foe up into the air so high, they never come back down. (Luigi sneaks up on Jigglypuff from behing and uses the Super Jump Punch. Jigglypuff: "JIGGLYPUFF!!!!!") Wiz: In addition, He has numerous power-ups at his disposal, including his trusty hammer and the Vanish Flower, which makes him invisible and intangible, Luigi could be next to you... watching you... right now. Boomstick: Aahhh, stop that! He was trained by the Thunder God himself in the powerful Thunder Hand technique. With this he can shoot lightning at his foes or at deadly soccer balls. Wiz: And after spending so much time in Mario's shadow, Luigi has somehow gained the ability to manipulate some sort of negative energy. (Luigi dances as he does the 'Negative Zone') Boomstick: Remember when Mario Bros. was about running around and jumping on turtles?Anyway, you were saying something about physics breaking time energy or whatever? Wiz: Luigi's Negative Zone can devastate a nearby opponent. Its effects are random, but unavoidable, ranging from sudden dizziness to uncontrollable tripping over absolutely nothing. Boomstick: But when Luigi wants real firepower, he busts out the Poltergust 5000, a handy vacuum cleaner which can somehow kill ghosts. It can KILL that which is already DEAD. Wiz: He ain't afraid of no ghosts. (Ghost frightens Luigi) Wiz: Scratch that, he's afraid of all ghosts, bugs, water, flowers, the sun. Luigi is a coward and doesn't even try to hide it. Granted, his fears are usually justified,... usually. Boomstick: He's also pretty clumsy, what did you think would make a terrible combination. But like the Chinese Drunken Master style, Luigi harnesses awkwardness to make himself even more vicious. He's more powerful than he seems, murdering Goombas and Koopas by the hundreds every day. (Clip of Luigi using a cannon on the Koopas in "Koopa's Kartoon Show") Boomstick: Ha Ha. Before we go any further, I'd like to point out that the unmaking cannon belongs to a bunch of children. "IS IT BEDTIME NOW MOM?!" Goush! No more parents!! Wiz: Even without it, Luigi has defeated Dimentio, discovered the Grand Final Galaxy, raised a ravenous man-eating dinosaur, and even rescued Mario from certain doom on three separate occasions. The Green Thunder can pretty much do it all. Boomstick: Luigi is one mean, green, fighting machine. Luigi: (Puts on Poltergust) "Yeah." (Speaking into the nozzle) "I do it." (Poses) "Ho-ho!" (Dancing) Hmm, hmm, hm. Hm hm hm hm hm hm. (Hits car and sees stuff fall down) Oh... Tails Tails: All systems go... full speed ahead! Wiz: Born the very same day Dr. Eggman began his robot powered takeover of the world, Miles Prower- Boomstick: Haha! I get it! Miles Pr Ower (per hour)! Creativity like that is why Sega is still making consoles... Wiz: Ahem, Miles was awkwardly born with two tails. Mere minutes after being welcomed into the world, Eggman's deadly forces made Miles Prower an orphan. Boomstick: Whoa, that's... that's pretty fucked up. Wiz: Eight years later, and after some much needed counseling, Miles stumbled upon a broken-down biplane and happily repaired the whole vehicle on his own. Boomstick: Well, of course. Just like all walking, talking, adolescent, two-tailed foxes can. Anyway turns out, that plane happened to belong to Miles' personal idol, Sonic the Hedgehog. Sonic: What're you doing? Boomstick: Why Sonic needed a plane in the first place is beyond me, but whatever. Wiz: It was Sonic, who first suggested that Miles' birth defects could be used to fly by spinning them like helicopter blades. Which is obviously impossible because it would never create weight disability and-- *Shocked to see that Miles is flying* WHAT?! Boomstick: And so, Sonic gave his rotory ass the oh so obvious nickname he deserved. TAILS. Wiz: Well that's stupid. That's like if you were nicknamed Boomstick because you just like shotguns. Boomstick: Don't be fucking ridiculous Wizard. Anyway, besides flight, Tails' copter butt blades are strong enough to bust metal, and he can use them like a turbine of an engine to keep up with Sonic's super fast speeds. He can almost reach, the speed of sound. Wiz: Tails pledged himself to Sonic's freedom fighting cause against Dr. Eggman, and the two became friends, almost like brothers. They also share a sort of teacher-student relationship, though it wasn't always clear who was the student. Boonstick: It was Tails who invented the famous Spin Dash. Not the speedy hedgehog. Wiz: Tails is a genius and a master mechanic. Boomstick: He's so much smarter than Sonic, that he actually learned how to swim. Wiz: He has built several planes and combat mechs and has numerous gadgets on hand. Like, the Projectile Ring, which can pull or latch onto objects, almost like a grappling hook. Boomstick: But despite being a super geek, he really likes to blow shit up. He carries a huge supply of bombs. Big bombs, napalm bombs, remote bombs, flash-bang grenades, bombs shaped like magic rings, bombs shaped like mice, bombs shaped like your mother. You name it, he's got a bomb for it. Wiz: He also wields the Magic Hand, a long-range comical punching weapon, and the Energy Ball arm cannon. Boomstick: Which is ripped straight out of Mega Man! He built all this HIMSELF, but never a device to breath underwater. Kinda dropped the ball there, sidekick. *Drowning music plays. Counter hits zero. Tails drowns* Wiz: Unlike Sonic's speed-blitzing battling style, Tails relies on logic and tactics in a fight. His Shield Bot fortifies his defenses and his Medibot heals wounds over time. Boomstick: But he's a total wimp. He can't fly forever, and if he doesn't have Sonic around to hold his hand, he's scared of pretty much everything. After a good thunderclap you'll find him shivering his spiny ass off in the bathtub. Sonic: Right, we should hurry. *Thunderclap* Tails: GAAHH!! I'm afraid of lightning!! Wiz: Well, he is only 11 years old, and the feats he's accomplished at his age are beyond impressive. Like being able to run 100 miles per hour without his tails, stopping a nuclear missile, and saving the MULTIVERSE by transforming into... Uh... ( http://img1.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20091014064711/archiesonic/images/8/89/TitanTails01.png ) Boomstick: Don't do steroids kids. Sonic: We good to go or what, Tails? Tails: I've built a TV out of paperclips. Sonic: Yeah. Tails: And reprogrammed a super computer using dishwashing detergent and a toothpick. Sonic: I know. Tails: So look, fixing a propeller on a bi-plane? That's about as difficult as taking a nap. Sonic: 'Kay, I didn't need your whole life story. A simple "good to go" would have been cool. Tails: Alright, good to go! Sonic: Cool! Fight Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set. Let's end this debate, once and for all! Boomstick: IT'S TIME FOR A DEATH BATTLE!! ...................... Tails flies down onto a pipe and starts scouting the area, but Luigi pops out of the pipe, making Tails jump down. The plumber jumps out of the pipe angrily to face Tails saying "Let's-a go!", referencing his enterance in Super Smash Bros. Brawl. FIGHT! Tails uses his energy cannon, but Luigi powers through with a Green Missile, but his attack misses as Tails jumps away and hits Luigi down to the ground with his tails. Luigi jumps back up as Tails uses the spin dash to charge at his opponent, but Luigi counters with the hammer, hitting Miles up into the air. Luigi follows him upwards with his Skuttle Jump and they go blow-for-blow, with it being Tails Swipes VS Luigi Cyclones. The two eventually knock each other away, Tails into the air and Luigi onto the ground. Luigi walks around as Tails closes in on him and the plumber tries to jump up and hit Tails with his Hammer again, but Tails counters it with his tails again, knocking Luigi back. Tails lands on the ground and tries out another spin dash, but this time Luigi launches Tails up with his Super Jump Punch. Tails manages to recover though and begins flying around the place from his high altitude. He then goes back down to the ground, picks up Luigi and begins to fly back up, but Luigi uses his vanish flower to confuse Tails, and knocks the fox away with his hammer to break free. The Hammer and Tails's gadgets go blow-for-blow first with the Magic Hand and Hammer colliding, Tails taking out his arm cannon again but Luigi simply hits him, Tails using the Magic Hand from the ground now but doing nothing to his intangible adversary and finally as Tails charges up his arm cannon once more, Luigi nails him in the face and sends him downwards a bit. As Tails recovers from the blow and starts flying again Luigi uses the Scuttle jump again to land safely as the invisibility wears off. But soon after the Luigi lands, Tails drops multiple bombs surrounding the plumber and leaving him to run around in panic. Luigi then gets the idea to suck up the bombs with his Poltergust 5000, and fires all the bombs at Tails. However, they are launched just barely too low to hit Tails, and it backfires on him as they land before he can run and blow him sky high. After being launched up, Luigi notices a pipe and dives into it, then shooting out with his Lightning powers fully activated, completely surrounded in lightining. He hits Tails with his Super Jump Punch, followed by a Green Missile and then slams into him multiple times with Luigi Cyclones before hitting him with his Hammer, and transfering all of the electricity into his hands, sending Tails away with an extremley powerful thunderhand. In the distance, Tails gets back on his feet and uses his Medi Bot to heal, but Luigi somehow clears all that distance and uses his Poltergust to bring it close to him and the Hammer to destroy it. Luigi then tries to suck Tails in and finish the fight, and almost succeeds until Tails throws his projectile ring at a nearby pipe to keep himself steady, and throws out a Flash Bang which Luigi's Poltergust sucks up and escapes into a pipe. The Flash Bang blows up, and while Luigi is dizzy, Tails comes out of the pipe and rigs a bomb onto the Poltergust and tries stalling him with his Shield Bot, but Luigi quickly destroys the bot with his hammmer again. Tails jumps away from his broken machinery as Luigi pulls out and breaks a Smash Ball. Tails begins to walk towards Luigi but the plumber unleashes Negative Zone. Tails trippes up and is almost hit with Luigi's hammer but he flys up to just barely escape it. He is almost sucked up by the Poltergust and finished, but Luigi is forced to stop when he notices the bomb and tries to throw it away. Unfortunately, while Tails escapes the blast with his superior speed, Luigi does not and is sent hurling through the air until he slides up to the front of a pipe as the Negative Zone gets destroyed. Tails quickly runs up to Luigi (with his tails on fire for a brief moment) and has him backed up against the pipe. With the two being face-to-face, Luigi readies his Hammer to squash Tails and end the fight, but isn't fast enough as the Magic Hand quickly rockets forwards, bursting through and impaling both Luigi and the pipe as a load of blood bursts out of the plumber's body. Tails goes off to heal himself with another Medi Bot as Luigi dead corpse is left on the pipe with blood still coming out from where the Magic Hand impaled him. ' K.O.!' DEATH BATTLE Results Boomstick: Well, there goes the Year of Luigi. Wiz: While Luigi technically has more combat experience, and has survived being Nintendo's whipping boy, Tails' skills and arsenal were more than the green capped plumber can handle. Boomstick: His training with Sonic makes him faster and his superior mobilty gave him complete control over the battlefield. Wiz: Also, he has an outrageous I.Q. of 300, which is about as much as Albert Einstein and Steven Hawking combined. Boomstick: hell, Tails is stronger, too. He can move 10 tons, while Luigi struggles to lift a large radish. Wiz: And Tails' gadgets more than make up for any of his weaknesses. Boomstick: Looks like Luigi was outfoxed. Wiz: The winner is MILES 'TAILS' PROWER. Trivia *This fight was made to commemorate the Year of Luigi, which had ended just four days before this fight's release. **Ironically though, Luigi lost. *This is the second Death Battle in which a Mario character and a Sonic character were pitted against each other, the first being Mario vs. Sonic. **It was also the second Death Battle in which the Sonic character won against the Mario character, the first being Mario vs. Sonic. *This is the fourth Death Battle to have power-ups. *This is the fourth time that an episode of Death Battle is not sponsored by any web ads. The first three were Dr. Eggman vs. Dr. Wily, Ivy vs. Orchid, and Terminator vs. Robocop; and the last one was the Pokemon Battle Royale. *This Death Battle has the second most Negative Reception. (The First being Goku vs Superman) *Publicly, this is the fifth Death Battle episode to have the most fanboys raging about their preferred character (Luigi) losing to the underdog (Miles 'Tails' Prower), the first 4 are Princess Zelda vs Princess Peach, Link vs Cloud Strife, Batman vs Spider-Man, and Goku vs Superman; and the sixth one is the Pokemon Battle Royale. *This is the last Death Battle in which the classic thumbnail is used with the character filling up the entire photo with a line down the middle. Shortly after its release, all the thumbnails were changed. Category:Season 2 episodes Category:Death battles Category:The battles fanboys rage on about Category:'Super Mario vs Sonic the Hedgehog' themed Death Battles Category:Sponsorless Death Battles Category:Fights made for commemoration Category:Fights animated by Erik Category:Magic vs Technology Battles